Sameness

After a couch nap and nine hours of solid sleep, waking up naturally, I am excited about a day without work and going on an adventure.  Breaking from my sameness routine, I’m going to a new area to do errands, take my dog for a walk and take photos.   Then we are going out to dinner at a new place.  Sometimes a little shake-up from routine can mean the world.  Of course I am just planning this now and who knows how it will turn out.  It’s still cold and windy and there’s a lot to do on the home front this weekend.  I was mindful yesterday of being on time and present at work, so that made that better.  Structure and routine can be good, but if that’s all there is to one’s life, not leaving room for spontaneity or creativity, it really does dampen the soul.

Blog, blog, blog

I get sucked into the blogosphere and almost forget to post my morning pages. Not much sleep last night and off to work again. I did bake – rather maniacally – yesterday. No need to buy bread for weeks now. I walked, talked, met new people, took photos (hard to do around new people met in parks). Even with three days off, I barely scratched the surface of my to do list. That would be okay, because I had a lot of good times, but not okay, because now I have to do all the stuff I avoided at night after work.

Errands

Because I took Saturday off, I had many errands to run yesterday.  After four hours of racing to various stores, bank etc, I was utterly and totally exhausted.  Home to make a rather elaborate dinner and required family phone calls and then I could only melt into the couch to veg out in front of the tv.  My dog had only a short walk, I stole only a few minutes for photographing.  There’s got to be a better way.  I will try to make today better, by concentrating equally on what still has to be done and what I still want and need to do to save this day off.

Taking Time

My dog and I went to my new spot yesterday and had a lovely time.  We met a woman with two wonderful dogs.  She and I talked while the dogs ran and played.  I also read for a while, which precipitated an unplanned nap and puttered around the house.  No, I didn’t get much done, compared to a usual Saturday, but it was so much better than usual.

Three Days

After a very special party last night, I am looking at a three day weekend where it’s up to me to make it a nice balanced time including relaxation, recreation and refreshment.  My usual outlook is to do what to I have to do and then collapse in between, but no one makes me do that except myself.  I still wrote a to do list, but instead of all errands and chores, there are things like walk, knit, read on it.  Let’s see if this works.

32 Hours

Tomorrow is the big day, when many friends will come to my place and I will serve high tea. In between then and now, I have lots to do, lots of lists to plow through. Going to try to do one thing at a time, not panic, be in the now and all that.

Waking Up

I realized this morning that I have two modes of waking up these days. One, is being ripped awake from a sound sleep by my alarm and the other, is waking up in a bit of a panic about things I need to remember to do. This hasn’t always been the case. I tried to remember back to what it was like to wake up and just be – all cozy and warm in bed, noticing the light etc. Something was missing and that made me realize that over a decade ago, pre divorce, pre single parenting, I used to like to cuddle in the morning. So now I’m wondering if I married my to do list and didn’t even know it.